Monday, January 14, 2013

Everyone Needs to Leave Taylor Swift Alone

If you don't already know who Taylor Swift is, a simple Google search will tell you that:

1) she is a famous singer who tends to write songs about her ex-boyfriends, and
2) she sure seems to have a lot of ex-boyfriends.

Taylor swift and all her ex boyfriends

If you dare to search further, you will soon find out that Taylor used to be known as "America's Sweetheart", but that since then, many have started slamming the pop/country singer as "a bad role model". My personal favorite insult is when someone called Taylor a "slut-shaming purity princess".

While I can't defend Taylor's "slut-shaming" (she does a pretty good job of making fun of the cheerleader in "You Belong with Me), there is one thing I'm convinced of:

Everyone needs to leave Taylor Swift's personal life alone. Why?

1) You Are Probably A Hypocrite

In the song "You Belong with Me", Taylor is singing to a guy who is dating a hot cheerleader, trying to convince him that although the sexually-liberal cheerleader may wear "short skirts" and "high heels", he actually belongs with the nerdy and modest bookworm. Some people have called out Taylor for trying to "slut-shame" the cheerleader, and I totally agree with them. Women can wear whatever they want, and we need to be free to embrace our sexuality. "Glasses-wearing, socially-outcast" virgins aren't better or more moral than the rest of the population. In this song, Taylor is basically telling young girls that it's ok to call other girls "whores" for wearing certain clothes.

taylor swift and the slut-shaming lyrics of you belong with me
The original lyrics to "You Belong With Me".

So in this case, Taylor's critics might be right: it's hypocritical of her to claim to be a chaste and good role model for young girls, only to encourage name-calling. But then why do those same critics turn into hypocrites themselves, when they bad-mouth Taylor's personal life?

pictures of all taylor swift's boyfriends
Taylor's many ex-boyfriends.

The problem that haters seem to have with Taylor is that she simply dates too many men. In 4 years, rumors have abounded over her relationships with Taylor Lautner, Joe Jonas, John Meyer, Jake Gyllenhaal, Conor Kennedy and most recently, Harry Styles from One Direction. And people have a problem with that. For instance:

Really JANUARY 07, 2013 | 2:33 PM
Disturbing to know she's been with so many guys. To the person that said she's only been with 6 of them, that's still way too many within a short time period, plus it was mentioned that she was "rumored" that she dated some of them. And how would you know? Are you her personal assistant? Whether she was intimate or not with these guys, I still believe she should take a break from dating and find herself. That's what some people do between the ages of 18-23.

Well, Mr/Ms. "Really", apparently even 6 boyfriends is too many. And how many boyfriends does the average girl have during their life? And who are you to decide that a certain number of boyfriends in 4 years is "disturbing"?

Moreover, while you are right that it is a great idea to take time off when you have relationship troubles, I believe I am correct in stating that most young people do not take 5 years out of their life and quit the dating scene, in order to find themselves. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that between the ages of 18-23, most people I know are in the market for a boyfriend/girlfriend.

"Taylor Swift must be terrible, lame and boring in bed. She can't keep a man."

 Oh, sorry, I didn't know that women are responsible for all the failings of a relationship. Also, didn't we have a whole revolution about how women are more than just sex objects that must pleasure men?

12:19 PM on 01/09/2013
How many guys does she have to bang before we start using the word SL-T

Um, how about we just never use the word "slut" anymore, period, ever. Allowing people like JRod3164 to villify sexually-liberated women and girls has spawned into a phenomenon called "rape culture". Oh, that girl was raped? Was she wearing a skirt? Was she frequently sexually active? Well, she was probably "asking for it".

Even in the workplace, men accused of sexual harassment will use a woman's sexual history against her as evidence that she "wanted it". This double standard is perpetuated each time we call someone a "slut", which promotes the outdated idea that sex makes a girl unclean or a bad person. Hey, if we are mad that Taylor Swift slut-shamed in "You Belong With Me", then why are we doing it?

it's my body i do what i want-go feminism!

You want an example of how Taylor Swift's critics are "slut-shaming" her? Just take a look at the reason why Harry Styles and Taylor Swift broke up. Radar Online reported that:

Harry Styles dumped Taylor Swift after growing tired of her “asexual” ways...“Taylor is so concerned that the public will think she’s a wh*re because she dates around, that she doesn’t put out,” a pal close to the...singer told “What she doesn’t get is that the guys keep dumping her because she’s being a prude.” 
This just sounds pitiful! Here is a girl who has been criticized so heavily for her boyfriends that she doesn't even allow herself to be sexually fulfilled for fear that someone will use that info against her. And the fact that she doesn't allow herself any sexual liberty is driving away all the men! Damned if you do, damned if you don't, Taylor.

2) You choose your role models

A photographer for the Jonas Brothers recently attacked TSwift for being a "bad role model". He said:
"How many break-ups is it going to take for you girls to realize that Taylor Swift isn’t a good role model unless your dream in life is to die alone? And if you’re going to defend her for her music, let me tell you now that saying you believe in any of Taylor Swift’s lyrics is like saying you trust your accountant because he’s been accused of tax evasion nine times."
Ouch, Mr. Jonas-Brothers-Photographer who is apparently an expert in relationships. Let me first point out that your "insult" doesn't even make sense. So if we believe in Taylor Swift's lyrics, then we are being tricked? Um, Taylor Swift warns girls against men ("I Knew You Were Trouble"), tells us to rise above haters ("Mean"), show us the importance of saying sorry in relationships ("Back to December") and helps us believe in the possibility of love ("Starlight" and "Sparks Fly"). She's not tricking us, she's trying to be our mother.

taylor swift speak now album cover
Taylor Swift imparts her wisdom to us in the form of catchy, 3-minute gospels.

I'm not even her fan and I found these uplifting messages in her songs in one Google search. How is she like a "tax accountant" that's tricked us nine times? Just because she breaks up with guys 9 times doesn't mean that she was misleading us or that true love is dead: if anything, her songs tell us that true love takes time ("Love Story") and that relationships take hard work and commitment ("Mine").

Besides, who said we took her as a role model? I don't think any teenage girl I know aspires to be like Taylor Swift, who has unfulfilling relationships with men who get tired of her after 6 months.

I'm sure Mr. Jonas-Brother-Photographer could argue that tween girls will see any pop star as a role model, but to that, I just have to say, I think Taylor's a much better role model than Rihanna, who is still dating the man who beat her up, or even Katy Perry. The lessons we learn from Taylor Swift? Work hard, do what you love, create your own content (more on that below), and aim for the top. Pretty good lessons, if you ask me.

3) We all kinda wish we were Taylor Swift

Now, the last reason that I can't take the "Taylor Swift dating police" seriously. Imagine if I were Taylor Swift. I'm blonde, 5'11, model-skinny, and worth about $70 million. I'm winning awards, and walking red carpets in diamond-encrusted gowns (and her everyday closet is pretty killer too).

taylor swift looks smoking hot at the people's choice awards 2013

If I were Taylor Swift, my manager would have to lock me in my hotel room every night for me to not go to glitzy parties, flaunt my mile-long legs, and date A-list actors and pop stars. And I truly believe the same goes for most of you. (Although some of you might disagree. Don't worry, I like to spend nights in as well, but if the Golden Globes are calling...)

Because at the end of the day, I'm Taylor Swift. I write songs about what I know: boys, breakups, and teenage angst. After all, I'm only 23---did you expect me to pen singles like "Honey, the Mortgage Rate is Too High"?

What's even more impressive is that I write my own songs, and they are so darn catchy that half the country can't stop singing them. Do you know who writes Beyonce's songs, or Rihanna's songs? Middle-age male music executives, that's who.

So sure, if I were Taylor Swift, go ahead and hate me because I'm breaking hearts. The fact is, I'm breaking those hearts because I'm pretty, successful, popular, and because I am able to make my own decision about boys. You may hate my songs, you might think I have emotional problems, you can call me a hypocrite for slut-shaming. But please don't be a hypocrite yourself: stay out of my personal life and stop judging me for doing what girls everywhere are doing right now: looking for someone we can stay with forever, taking a chance when dating them, and struggling with the end of a relationship.

As they say, you have to go through a few frogs before you find Prince Charming.

<3 Taylor Swift Brittney

Aw man, now that the post is over, I have to stop pretending to be Taylor Swift and go back to being boring old me. :(